Oftentimes I see women and girls on Twitter promoting a new male artist, friend or associate. It’s to the point where they tweet or post about the guy every day, encouraging people to check out his song, book or other project.
On the other hand, I very rarely see men promoting women who are artists, authors, movers and shakers.
Why do women have a tendency to be so supportive of their male counterparts even when they don’t get anything in return?
The answer is that a lot of women have an overwhelming need for acceptance by men (and other people period). We think that by promoting a guy he will come to love you or respect you more for it.
The truth is that most guys will do no such thing. They will use women as work horses to do their bidding, and if they do come up, those same women will be left behind in the dust. The most these women get in the end is a pat on the head and a “gee thanks.”
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t throw your support behind another person who you really believe in. But when you’re doing this day in and day out for a man who you are not even married to OR related to, I think you should be clear about WHY you’re doing it. If you’re married, his come up is your come up. If not, his come up is HIS come up — no matter what he says in the present day.
Time Is Invaluable – Use It Wisely
When a woman spends all of her time promoting a man, but doesn’t spend any time improving herself and promoting her own projects, she’s allowing invaluable time to tick by. Her goals and dreams are important too!
I once dated a guy who had the mentality that I was his main supporter, but didn’t care about my dreams. He didn’t even know what they were! It was almost as if he thought of me like his assistant or secretary — not a human being with goals of my own. I finally woke up and realized I was being used. I told him to stop calling me about his get rich quick schemes. Of course he didn’t like that… oh well!
Support should be reciprocal and balanced. Whenever it’s heavily one-sided it’s just not natural and someone is going to be left feeling hurt and used. Keep that in mind the next time you’re thinking about retweeting some guy’s project for the 10th time while neglecting your own personal goals, dreams and projects!