Who Pays on a First Date?

If you’re a woman who answered anything other than “the asker” or “the guy” I must ask why?

Why do you feel obligated to chip in or pay for a first date, especially if the guy asked?

Are you allowing the classic non-courteous male response “well, you all wanted equality!” to cloud your judgment, again I ask why?

The proper courtesy when someone asks you out on a date is for the asker to pay. That applies in the reverse of course, if you were eager enough to ask a guy out on a date (not recommended), you should be prepared to at least pay for half of the bill. The courteous thing for him to do in that situation, if he is seriously interested in you, is to decline your offer to pay and cover the bill.

The Dance
So why should the man pay for the first date? Because this is a part of the dance of starting a healthy relationship between a man and a woman. As I explain in my book Let Him Chase YOU, men are naturally the pursuers, the chasers, the “hunters” and are ultimately expected to provide for their families. Decent men see women as prizes, instead of expecting women to chase after them, so they have no problem treating a woman out to dinner in the courting phase.

Of course, as the relationship progresses, the woman should offer to treat her awesome man out to dinner or dancing once in a while. He has proven that he’s a guy she wants in her life, who can provide, who is thoughtful, who respects her womanhood and who enjoys taking care of her, so why wouldn’t she want to take care of him as well?

Think about it, it’s all very simple.

Love Lynn


Lynn Gilliard is the author of the relationship guide Let Him Chase YOU (available soon) and the eBook Friends With Benefits SUCKS (At Least for Women). She is an in-demand writer and transformational blogger helping people get in touch with their inner greatness.

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